I feel like I have a lot of ideals. I think this is a generally a good thing. The problem, though, is that all too frequently I find myself falling short of my ideals, and those very ideals end up crippling me with guilt. There are so many damn issues to worry about, how can one person make a difference, and should they even bother trying?
Here are some examples of things I wish I could change.
I value the environment, and I am constantly fretting over the massive amounts of waste I see going on around me every day. Like, why the hell does our neighborhood grocer insist on double bagging a single milk carton? And am I really the only one in the entire town who tries to bring my canvas bag with me when I shop? Does anyone but me care how much fossil fuel is wasted every year just se we can get kiwis from Chile in the winter time?
But despite my observations, am I the perfect eco-friendly consumer? Of course not. In the little town we live in there are no recycling facilities, so rather than continue to save up our recycling and load it into the car each month for our regular trip to the city, I now just toss everything into the garbage. It's just easier. Just this morning I drank from a styrofoam cup. Oh, the shame I feel even writing these words.
Here's another example: After listening to a story on This American Life, I think to myself "Are you kidding me? A kid can be brought to the U.S. from Mexico as a child, get her entire education here, even go to a University only to be told that she will never be able to go to realize her lifelong dream of going to medical school and practicing as an Obstetrician because she does not have a green card? (This same kid is working two jobs and commuting 2 hours each way in order to put herself through school.) How is that the land of opportunity?" The tears roll down my face, but what can I do?
I hate the inequality of social classes that exists in the U.S., but I have some Aveda hair products and top of the line road bike.
I am looking into getting my pilots license even though I hate the way we waste fossil fuels.
This just scratches the surface. I hear things in the news everyday that make me want to jump out of my chair and go knock on my senator's door to demand they help rectify injustices. I think to myself "What?! They are keeping all those people in Guantanamo just because they pissed someone off, and that someone decided to make a profit by turning them in? Not only is there no proof of wrong doing, but there aren't even any charges?. Our president is flat out lying to us about how all the prisoners there are Al Qaeda insurgents?! He's ignoring the Geneva Conventions AND Habeus Corpus?!! People know it's all lies and yet we are still keeping people there and and torturing them?!!!" Oh the rage, the disappointment, and ultimately the impotence that I feel.
Am I alone here?
Mahatma Gandhi said "You must be the change you want to see in the world"
I may be unique in my overly inflated sense of guilt and responsibility, but I don't think I'm alone in wanting to live in a way that affects social change positively. I still have no idea how to fix most of the world's problems, but I do feel like Gandhi's words are comforting and somewhat empowering.
I know what I'm about to type next will sound trivial in the face of all that's wrong with the world, but here's what I've got.
For the environment, I plan to can my own fruit and pasta sauces (actually my eco-conscious sis gave me this idea). She says it only takes her a day or two to can enough food for the entire year. Also, she can buy local produce because she just buys what is in season. Bingo. Just solved two major environmental problems with one fruit cellar.
For the wrongly imprisoned people? The struggling young students with no hope of ever realizing their dreams? The millions of gay citizens who self-righteous, religiously motivated persons continue to discriminate against for no particular reason other than they are made uncomfortable by the gay lifestyle? (I know, I hadn't even gotten around to introducing this idea in my earlier rantings, but I'm on a roll.) Well, frankly, I don't know. Even if I were willing to leave my career and dedicate myself fully to one of these causes, I wouldn't know where to start. The best I can do is embrace my local immigrant (not literally), frown when people utter homophobic comments, and, of course, stock up on produce when it's in season.
1 comment:
This is Kat ...
I struggle with the idea of being a human on Earth responsible for its future. Of course, I struggle on a selfish plane where I consider the ramifications of my actions and then way them on a scale of evilness.
For example:
Cars. I don't drive an SUV. I drive a Civic. But it isn't a hybrid. I can't afford a hybrid. And the public transportation here is more expensive than operating my vehicle -- and I think they don't service the buses enough.
Or, like, shoes. Leather shoes or pleather shoes? I mean, there are going to be shoes and many of them are going to live in my closet. But do you hurt the animals or do you buy something that doesn't biodegrade? Sure. OK. Canvas. But canvas makes me blistery. And I'd surely like to go barefoot, but it is frowned upon. And there are some creatures dwelling at just above the cellular level that would like to bore into my foot and live there probably. So ...
I don't give up, but I'm not fighting as hard as I can I guess because I will not be canning any vegetables or sauces.
But I try to be considerate of gas, packaging, chemicals, etc. Yuma has crap for recycling but that will be better in Tucson.
I was planning on using some leftover sewing project fabric to make grocery bags. I'll make you a few. When the cashiers see your stunning cheetah print grocery sacks, they'll just think you're stylin' your cute bags, not just that you're a self-righteous hippie :)
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